091

The story of 091 is remarkable for the turn of a zero into a folk hero.
Not much is known of 091 prior to his rise to becoming Australia’s most in demand socialite. However, we do how his star turn did come about. 091 used to meander the nightlife of Australia looking for fun. He would frequent clubs and bars seeking to see what the flashing lights, loud music, and poor lit rooms would offer him. Due to his unique appearance and his discernible hat, Sydney had nothing to offer such a dowdy man. But there he was weekend after weekend always around, but never welcomed. Dawdling about for attention that never arrived. Until one day a group of Goanna’s were celebrating another successful day engaging in degenerative trading of securities. The Go-bros were looking to score cheap laughs and they found the perfect target, 091. They invited the funny looking Goanna to their table and ordered shots. As the shots arrived the Go-bros started spreading them around. One asked him what his name was as a shot was being passed to him. Not wanting to drink more he pointed at his chest and said, “Oh I’m done.” And the Go-bros, in their drunken state, misheard and thought he was identifying himself as 091. So, it began the nickname, 091. He was loving the commodore, even if it was at his own expense, so much so he never corrected them. The appearance and look-likes one liners of 091 had the Go-bros entertained all night. Wanting to replicate a fun evening, they invited him out again so they could continue the laughter at 091’s expense. So, the Go-bros invited 091 out the following weekend to laugh at his expense. Oh, were these Go-bros a bunch of Hexens (German for witches). They traded stories and shared jokes at the office of 091 so much so additional co-workers wanted to meet him as well. Once the weekend had come about, double the number of Go-bros were present. Shots were passed, chanting of 091 was rampant, and everything was documented for the world to see. In the morning, social media was abuzz with videos of 091. Every video the only thing audible were the chants, “O-9-1, O-9-1, O-9-1.” Suddenly all of Australia was smitten with 091. The internet was ablaze with memes of 091. The social capital was built and oh how the tables turned. 091 used to be dawdling about for attention and now he is the center of it. The voluminous jokes, memes and stories have elevated 091 to cult status so much so that his social status is on par to that of the Australian President, Goanna 001. Fantasy has blended with reality; the joke has become the truth. Regardless, 091’s new mythological standing amongst the community has made one thing certain, wherever 091 goes, we algo.